Snowy days

The last couple of days have been pretty "zen" as Lara would say. Friday was a snow day, and Nana called early to ask the boys over for sledding and a sleepover. We said YES! Gabe and Zach enjoyed lots of time with their uncles and Nana (Grandpa was flying on Friday but we did get to see him on Saturday), playing games, sledding, baking, and sleeping in the living room on that super amazing pull our sofa Nana bought. Thank you Mom! There is nothing in the world like grabbing that extra 45 minutes of sleep in the morning without those interruptions that, don't get me wrong, I LOVE ---
"Mom, can I have a cookies?"
"No, its 5:25 in the morning."
"Mom, I waited. Can I have a cookie?"
"No, it's not even six. Aren't you supposed to be in bed til 6:30?"
"Can I play video games?"
"Can you open this yogurt?"
"Now can you open my yogurt?"
Rilla and I stayed in bed til 7:30; she decided to start chatting at seven but didn't seem to mind that I closed my eyes to listen.
Saturday night Julia was here, so Katy Julia and I watched an Audrey Hepburn movie (I, of course, fell asleep) after Katy straightened my hair, and Julia cut Katy's.
Snow again this morning, so we will stay home.

Rilla Bean and Claire Bear

Three days ago, Rilla found her voice. She discovered it, quite loudly, while we were at the Britains's house for lunch, and has been using it as much as possible since then - during Bible Study, story time, and especially when other babies are sleeping.

This morning she and I dropped the boys off at school, daddy at the gym, and headed down route 101 to visit Stephy and her newest daughter, Claire.  Claire was born on Rilla's due date, November 8, and it was very special to go through this "pregnancy" with Steph - doctor visits, ultrasounds, due dates- they were all pretty much the same while we awaited our two beautiful girls. Built in buddies for life. Love it.

Satisfaction baked right in

Three out of four kids are in bed, the house is almost silent, and I am looking back over my day feeling the peace and contentment that a good day brings with it. John skipped the gym today so I could accompany Zach on his field trip, "Penguin Olympics," at White's Farm. The culmination of all things penguin, we spent two hours reviewing amazing facts and then stepping outside (waddling, actually, since we were acting like penguins) to hunt for krill (pasta) and toboggan headfirst down a very icy slope located at the edge of a very icy field.  Knowing Zach wanted me there was great, and he introduced me to every child in the class, and said I was the nicest mom he every had! (I refuse to think too deeply about that statement.)
Katy tried out for the school musical tonight; she's been practicing some singing and we've been anticipating the audition for some time.  Hoping the cast list will be posted tomorrow, she remains skeptical about her performance, but I was pleased when she said that if she doesn't get a part in the play she would like to look into helping with lighting or costumes or something else involved in the production end of things. Good girl!
Gabe finished his second book in Sparkies at AWANA tonight, and was so proud to receive the blue ribbon and new book. He is fantastic at memorizing; to my shame, I am not so fantastic at reminding him and helping him with his verses.  Both boys received "jewels" tonight and overall the air was fairly bubbling with well-deserved pride in their achievements on the way home from church.
Wednesday is also date day for John and I; since I work on Monday nights now we are not home any evening together except for Wednesday, but we do have church that night so until after 8 we are out anyhow.  Going out every week has been so nice - it is a splurge but we are choosing to look at it as more of an investment.

On the bus headed to the Penguin Olympics

Look at that smile!

Girls Girls Girls

Yesterday Rilla and I went over to the Britain household for lunch - Jane had invited us over because her niece Becky was coming for the day with her five (yes, FIVE) little girls - Gabby (4), Dillon (2), and the triplets Sophie, Emma, and Lexi (8 months). I guess Jane just figured one more baby girl wouldn't harm anything, and she was right - it was really fun. The best part is that when I got there, Lara was already there as well as one of Jane's friends, and they had sent Becky away for some alone time, which she must've needed so badly. The triplets are crawling now and while that comes with the freedom of them being able to do a few things for themselves, like holding bottles or self-feeding, I can't imagine what it means for their mother's daily routine. So next time I am freaked out because my laundry is piling up like Mount Everest (I do tend to refer to laundry as my Everest) I will remember my lunch at the Britains. (All five girls and their amazing mother seem remarkably well-adjusted - way to go, Becky!)

God"s valentine

Last night I was allowed a moment that comes along once in awhile, a moment when my child's innocence and pure heart fills me with quiet delight. After many not-so-quiet moments of getting my boys to bed, I had gone back in for the promised "check on" and snuggle; both boys were still awake. I lay next to Zach, listening to them breathe, thankful for them in warm beds with full tummies. Gabe piped up from the top bunk, "I'm thinking about what I can give God."
"Do you know the only thing God wants from you?" I asked, half thinking Gabe would give me the "right" answer.
"No. Maybe something I can wrap?"
"Well, guys, He just wants your love. That's all. God just loves us and wants us to love Him."
Gabe thought for a moment and then came out with this:
"Maybe next year on Valentine's Day I could make Him a valentine. Yeah, next year I will make Him one, so He knows I love Him."
Man, I love that kid.

If I build it, she can eat!

Due to Gabe's fever, we were home from church AGAIN this morning. Zach and I made good use of our time, though, as I was able to put together Rilla's highchair, and Zach is creating something with the box. Once I realized that the entire highchair only came with two screws, I knew I was cut out for the job!

Saturday again

Every week I wonder where the time has gone, and this week is no different. This was a fairly full week for our family and I'm so thankful I have been able to record some of it on my sweet new laptop! Katy downloaded some photos from the amazing camera Nana gave her so I will pick a few to add to this post. Grr. I added a fantastic photo of Katy in her costume but can't get it to the proper size. I'll get there.

morning

Last night I got to snuggle Gabe for awhile; he woke up right after we got home from Katy's play, and asked for a drink and a snuggle, and I obliged him on both accounts. Gabe is the type of kid that is just generally easy going, snuggly, tender, and wants to please. Surrounded by other siblings I am afraid that sometimes I don't snuggle him enough, give him enough of what he needs. So it was a treat for me.
Zach was up before six, but the rule is six-thirty, so he snuck back to see me and Rilla (Daddy often ends up wanting the peace and quiet found on the couch after the 1a.m. feeding). When I told him to go wash his hands before holding the baby he said, "OK, I just hope dad isn't lurking around."  Rilla had her bottle and then we all snuggled a bit; Zach ended up studying the "gems" dangling off of my lampshade, concluding that they must be diamonds, except for the one that was shaped differently, which must be limestone. Home Goods would be shocked to know how much that lamp is worth!
So Gabe will be home today due to his fever; he, no doubt, is anticipating a full day of video games, Apple TV, and perhaps if he is lucky some re-runs of AFV.

One Acts at Concord High

Tonight was Katy's acting debut at Concord High, where she had a role in a play called "An Actor's Nightmare"-- she played the Executioner, and was the cutest little bearer of death I have ever seen! So proud!  Having listened to her downplay her role for the last few weeks, we were very pleased to learn she really had a few lines, and she delivered them with gusto!
Besides my beautiful daughter, the highlight of that play for me personally was knowing that the main character (a six foot tall VERY THIN teenage boy) was wearing a pair of my old leggings. Glad I could do my part to contribute to the arts.
Act 2 was a very nicely done play taken from a Russian short story (hooray!).  The highlight of this one for me is a toss-up: every time the lights dimmed in the auditorium all the boys would start making silly popping noises with their mouths and I couldn't stop laughing (and my husband of course couldn't help joining in). OR when the skinny kid's fake moustache kept falling off the right side of his face.  At first he kept nonchalantly running his fingers over it, but by the time half of it was wagging around, pointing at the wall when he turned stage right, I was crying hysterically - tears of laughter. And then the lights dimmed, and the boys all started in on the weird noises  and it was curtains for me.

Older than dirt

Today Zach asked me if I was alive when there were cavemen, and if so, did I know any? And if I wasn't quite old enough to know any cavemen, then did my mom? Because how old was she?  Mmmmm. I explained that she would only be about 60 years old, so neither of us knew any of the cavemen.
THEN, in the car Gabe was explaining that he was sad because he was telling his friends at school that he wished he could go to art school, and I told him that he could when he got older. He countered with "But I'm not that good, sometimes the pictures don't look just right," so then I said that if he kept practicing he would just get better and better. 
"Yeah," he said, "maybe when I'm  your age." 
"That's right," I replied, feeling good about our encouraging conversation, until he muttered under his breath:
"In a million years."

Katy saves the day

So around midnight John woke me up to tell me that Zach was sick - AGAIN.  Having known this was coming for a couple of days because half of Gabe's school is sick, I handled it with only mild panic because we had to leave at 7:20 for school drop-offs and court.  Then John told me Katy would have to stay home with Zach because we didn't really have another option, and in my sleepy state I really did start to freak out because of course today is Katy's dress rehersal for the senior one-acts. She, however, was tickled pink to stay home with her little brother, and we were home in plenty of time for her to watch some tv in her room AND make it to dress rehersal. Phew.

Daddy and his little princess

Rilla becomes a Godsey!!

We went to court in Nashua this morning for our "inter-locketory hearing" where the judge signed our adoption petition and Rilla's last  name officially changed. May 7 will be the final date for the adoption,and then... TA-DA! It's all done.

Monday Monday

Monday mornings are (supposed to be) sacred to Laurie and I and our ever growing love of coffee, coffee products, coffee cake, et cetera. Two years ago we started our Monday morning tradition of dropping off the kids at school and then meeting at Starbucks (there is only one in all of Concord, so no need to specify) to catch up on our lives and our caffeine. Zach tagged along last year and would visit with Evan, who still has to come this year, which I think will, more than anything else in his life, get him excited about kindergarten next year. No more Mondays at Starbucks!! Of course I have exchanged bringing Zach along for bringing Rilla along, and we've missed a few weeks here and there, but overall this part of my week is very refreshing. The hardest part is getting out that door.
Recently I realized that Laurie and I share a few major life experiences, and although our friendship has been growing for seven years now (!) it still seems new to me in a lot of ways. I guess because unlike my other closet friends who I met when I was younger and grew up with - and I would include college friends in this - Laurie and I met when I was already married and a mother. So our friendship is based on our lives as adults, on the similarities we share in our cicle of  influence. When I consider my other closest friends, the years just add up - 23 years (Steph), 12 years (Tamara), 24 years (Marisa and Jennie) - so I can see why this friendship is still feels young. Both of us lost mothers, have stepmothers we are close to, we both had children one year apart, we both had to have surgery that left us infertile at a young age, we have both adopted children.  Those are major, life changing examples of things we have been through, but none of that even occurred to me until recently. All in all it is a very special friendship to me, and I love Monday coffee hour with her.

Donut Despair

This morning after church when I finally managed to get out the sanctuary door with the baby the first thing I saw was Zach, tears streaming down his cheeks while he nibbled on part of a doughnut. "What's wrong?" I asked, picturing some children's church craft gone wrong (which come to find out also happened). "The doughnuts are gone!!" he wailed. Some good samaritan must have given him a bite of theirs. After promising to stop for a doughnut on the way home from church, I took off to change the baby and Zach walked down the hall. Two minutes later he came out of a classroom armed with construction paper and a colored pencil; I could see a tally mark at the top of the paper.  When asked what he was doing, Zach told me in his slow, serious voice that he was going to find out who ate all the doughnuts. Sure enough, he was walking up to everyone in the foyer, pencil poised to add another tally mark: "Um, did you have a doughnut off of that table over there?"
I guess I should tell his first grade teacher that all those homework assignments involving tally marks really paid off. Personally, I learned today that my old argument about math not applying to real life just won't hold water anymore - especially where doughnuts are concerned.

Saturday at Nana's

Often on Saturdays I pack up the kids and head over to mom and dad's.  The snow is piled far above the boys heads in many places, and the amount of work it takes for them to simply walk across the yard assures me of a long night's sleep ahead. Rilla has snuggled into Nana, wrapped in the whisper-soft blanket Nana had begun to crochet for her before we knew there was a baby on the way, and we just navigated the portrait studio web site to purchase extra photos at a ridiculous price. ("Well worth it," says Mom.)
This is the day of the week that I feel is a perfect catch 22; going out or staying in, I'm never sure what to do. So I usually end up here.
Wednesday is the court hearing for John and I - we will sign the adoption petition with our lawyer present, in front of the judge. My understanding is that this is the only time we will actually go to court, that the adoption will magically be finalized six months after the parental surrender was signed.  That day is either May 22 or May 6, we aren't exactly sure, since like us the birthmother signed once with her lawyer and once in front of the judge.   I wonder how long it will take for "adopted" to stop being an everyday word in my life?
Zach and Gabe are back inside, waiting for the hot chocolate that is the automatic ending to every snowy encounter. The Shrek bandaid on Zach's ear from where Duchess scratched him this morning is glaring at me, apparently hungry for a chocolaty treat as well.

The Queen of Darkness

Two days ago that is what Zach was calling me as I marched him to his bed after some very disruptive and insistent behavior at the dinner table.  And what's funny is sometimes that is exactly how I feel about myself! Adding our fifth child to the family has proven to be much more of a challenge that I presupposed it would be. I am really excited about sharing my thoughts as I step-parent, parent, and adoptive-parent our children. Recently I wondered, what other type of parenting role is left for me, at the ripe old age of 31, to add to my family? Huh. I can think of at least one, but as John says, lets focus on what's in front of us for now.

p.s.

Apparently none of our old pictures have been transferred yet. Stay tuned.

Here we go again

A few years ago, shortly after we moved to Concord I think, I was so impressed by Tamara's blog that I decided to start one of my own. Writing is a nice outlet, and goodness knows my life is entertaining. Over the years as computers broke, children were added to our family, I forgot my password et cetera, the blog fell by the wayside; this morning John installed our new computer and so here I am again.  Can't wait.